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Most sex parties will have rules to help keep everyone safe, which range from how to dress, to how to ask for consent, and whether there's a cover charge to enter. And it doesn't hurt to show off a few of your goodies and props to help get conversations flowing. “Going in with the familiar can help,” Parks says. Second, you know what your toys can do to get you off. “If you bring your own toys, you can ensure what you’re using is clean,” she says. This is good for a few reasons, Parks says. “It can be damaging to go in, not set any expectations, and find your partner doing something you’re not comfortable with and not feel like you can speak up in the moment.” In addition to figuring out your boundaries as a couple, Parks recommends developing a safe word that you can use in the moment to say you’re not okay with something “without having to go into a big dialogue then.” Bring your own toys, if it’s allowed. “This is very important for couples, especially couples who are exploring for the first time,” Parks says. Are you okay with the playing with others? How far can each of you go? Will you only have sex if your partner is also involved? What happens if one of you wants to leave?
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If you have a partner and you’re bringing them, you need to hash out in advance what you’re both cool with. Establish rules with your partner ahead of time. Of course, you won't be walking around waving a piece of paper at potential sexual partners, but putting pen to paper is a way to come to terms with that you are and aren't okay with before you feel compelled to consent to something you're not actually comfortable with. Setting boundaries and writing them down will allow you to "succinctly summarize what you are and aren’t okay with,” Parks says.
HOW TO FIND A GAY SEX PARTY PLUS
Plus, if, after making the rounds, you haven't found anyone else you’re interested in, you've always got your plus one to hook up with. A sex-party buddy can easy your anxieties as you walk in, act as a sounding board if you're unsure throughout the event, and even act as a buffer if you need one, Parks says. This can be your partner, a casual bedmate, or a friend who is interested in checking out sex parties, too. Ahead, you'll find all the advice you'll need before sending out your RSVP. “You want to make sure the population attending is more aligned with what you’re seeking,” she says.īut, no matter which sex party you choose, there are some general tips to keep in mind that can help make your experience a more comfortable-and pleasurable-one. “It’s more of a mutual masturbation situation, where you’re engaging with someone or multiple people on a screen and it’s a shared pornographic experience,” she says.Įach individual party will have its own set of rules about what is and isn’t expected of you and other party-goers, so Parks recommends doing your research in advance.
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“Sometimes there are niche parties for women or men only and swinger parties, and there are some where single women or couples will get a discount on their ticket.”Īnd while you might be able to score an invite to an in-person sex party during the pandemic, Parks says safer virtual sex parties are also an option. “There are multiple types of sex parties that folks can attend,” says Shawntres Parks, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Los Angeles who specializes in couples and sex therapy. So, understanding the hows, whens, and whys of it all are key to enjoying the experience.įirst things first, not all sex parties look alike. For the uninitiated, a sex party can be pretty daunting, especially because they involve bringing something typically considered private into a public and voyeuristic space.